The Great Northboro Chain Saw Massacre.

This story was written and sent to me by my father, John Rogers. I look forward to posting more of his stories in the future! Read on…

This isn’t a story about Freddy Kruger. There is no violence: Nobody gets murdered or hurt.

Once upon a time we bought a 4 year old house in a small farm town in Massachusetts, so we became “Massholes.”

The house was great inside, but not a lot had been done to the land around the house. In particular there were 5 or 6 Poplar trees close to the front of the house. Every spring they would drop seeds and fluffy stuff from their leaves which would blow all over, and of course every fall those same leaves would fall and also blow all over.

Suzy’s Mom hated these trees, and wanted them cut down.

One Christmas Santa brought me a $99 Remington not-for-heavy-duty-use chain saw.
Guess somehow Santa had gotten word that Remington chain saws would cut down Poplar Trees.

When spring came, one day when I wasn’t working, a suggestion was made that we try out my new chain saw. So, where would we “try out my new chain saw”? On one of the Poplar trees in front of the house of course!

We picked the smallest tree first, which was about 6″ in diameter. My $99 Remington chain saw cut this down like a piece of cake.

Next, Mom said “let’s cut another”, and she picked a much larger and taller Poplar tree–about 10″ in diameter and maybe 40 feet tall.

This tree was only about 10′ from the house, so to make sure it fell away from the house-and in an open spot where we hoped it would not get hung up in the other 3 or 4 trees still standing near it, being the experienced loggers we weren’t, we hooked a cable to our trusty old come-along and wrapped it around the tree about 12′ up from the bottom, and got our old Ford truck and parked it beside the street ( which was about 40′ away) and hooked the other end of the come-along cable to the back of the truck.

I cut the usual “V” in the trunk of the tree, trying to guesstimate where we wanted the tree to fall, and then started cutting from the back of the tree downward toward the notched V on the other side.

Meanwhile, Mom kept cranking on the come-along to try to force the tree to fall where we wanted it to.

Ayah, we sure weren’t experienced loggers!

Just as the tree was about to fall, it started leaning sideways, and when the saw cut through the trunk, the tree, became caught at the top in the adjoining trees. The trunk fell off the stump, but the tree was still standing almost straight up.
So we started up the old Ford truck and gently tugged the tree away from the house. Then we looked both ways up and down the street, and when there were no cars in sight, pulled the still standing tree away from the tree tops it was stuck in, and it came crashing down–right into the street!

When I went to start back up the trusty old Remington chain saw, it was out of gas.

As I was filling the gas tank back up, (we had the street blocked), along came the school bus.

I can still see the kids on that bus laughing at us as we cut the top of the tree off to clear the street!


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Author: John Rogers

John spent most of his adult life working in the railroad industry. He is now retired and enjoys road trips, watching trains, and writing.

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